Monthly Archives: April 2007

Porn Prank

SEATTLE – Some pranksters got to a time capsule before it was officially unsealed at the University of Washington.

The capsule had been sealed in the wall of the Communications Building in 1957, and contained textbooks, newspapers and tapes from that era.

But sometime in the early 1980′s someone broke in and left pornography and dirty underwear that drew giggles and gasps from a group of alumni.

The capsule is being replaced by another one containing digital media.

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i was porn in the usa (part one)

pornographer on a segway 

yes, i own a porn company.

during my journeys, this discovery gets a medley of reactions.  while most are intrigued, some become bambi in headlights and excuse themselves from my presence.  the intrigued ones typically start emerging themselves into a barrage of questions about my work.  everyone pretty much asks all the same questions and i don’t mind answering them as long as i’m in the mood to do it, since it never turns out to be a short conversation and i don’t always have the time or energy.  when i do field questions, they’re usually surprised at how boring some of it really is.  i mean, it’s work…accounting, paperwork (lots and lots of paperwork), employees, contract labor, laws that seem to change daily, visits from law enforcement, expensive attorneys, right wing attacks, countless hours in front of an editing machine, and so much more.  of course, in between all of that, there are nude people in front of me having sex….but most seem to tune out until i get to that part :)

i was extremely fortunate to have gotten on the web when there weren’t very many of us on it yet.  this gave me an edge over the masses, especially when i met the owner of an adult video company who told me that i could make money by sending people to his site.  in the days before (what we now call) spam, this was simple.  horny guys who saw my affiliate link clicked on it, bought porn, and then the company sent me a check once a month.  my first check from them for only half a month was about $3000.00.  i was in shock and just knew it was going to bounce, but it cleared without issue.  each month, the checks got bigger.  now you have to understand something here…i had never seen that amount of money in my life.  not in such a short amount of time for doing very little work (i.e. sitting at a computer) and i was hooked.  i kept teaching myself web design and eventually began learning how to do simple scripts, which increased my affiliate link’s exposure and my impatience for that big check in the mail.

but…what goes up must come down.  sort of.

suddenly more and more people were jumping on board the “information superhighway”, which caused others like me to begin their own porn affiliate venture.  this was the beginning of the onslaught of which we’re all now aware.  porn had saturated the web and countless thousands wanted their piece of the proverbial porn pie.

these bastards (teehee) started nipping at my income like a rabbid squirrel on his last nut and i had to do something.  fast.

i looked at every angle inside and outside the box.  analyzing, overanalyzing, beating dead horses, etc., until i decided that the company i was pimping traffic for had something i didn’t.  content.  i would soon discover that i needed that too.

during all of this, i got a part-time job at an adult video store to see if i could get any insider information, but the owner kept everything secret.  all i could do was observe what was selling on my shifts.

while sitting behind the counter one night, i began to notice how intimidated most people were to buy porn (especially if it was something like transsexual videos) and how seemingly embarassed they were to bring it up to the counter to pay for it.  i remember thinking that there had to be some way for me to put the porn on my website and then let them just order it through the mail from me.  i just figured that they could mail me an order form and a check or money order and then i’d buy the video for them and discreetly mail it to them (credit card processing didn’t exist back then for the average joe).

this revelation (almost an epiphany) spawned what was to become the caveat to where i am today.  but wait, is it really that easy to sell or make porn?  i mean, there was certainly nobody to ask how to do this…no “how to make and sell porn for dummies” book, nothing in the library.  just me, my instincts, my analytical skills, and my creativity.

i received zero support from the friends i told, except one (thanks jo ann!)  she loaned me some start up money (about a thousand dollars i think).  since i spent all my money i was earning and had nothing to show for it, i couldn’t afford this new endeavor.  she believed in me and that i could build something massive and loaned me the money without question or a time-frame to pay her back.  although i had a good idea what my next steps would be, i certainly had no clue how long it would take to make a profit and pay her back.  she new and understood this, so that pressure was off my shoulders.

after exhausting my brain trying to process how one would go about shooting a porn video (remember…porn videos were just these things with no origin that sat on the shelves at adult bookstores), i decided it was finally time to stop thinking and start shooting, knowing that some trial and error would do me good.  i’m the type who definitely learns from his mistakes and fortunes, so a porn shootin’ i went!

continued in part two

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Mr. Nude Seattle (Update)

nude

We wanted to update this post with a follow up:

The 9th anuual Mr. Nude Seattle Contest was held on 4/2/07 in Seattle. There were six contestants and the 1st Runner-Up was AMVC.com’s latest find, Billy The Kidd.

Martin, the creator, and the drag hosts did an excellent job as usual and the enthusiastic audience was filled to capacity, cheering on the amateur contestants and making each one feel appreciated.

AMVC.com sponsored the cash prizes and this was their 4th (or 5th..i forget :) year as one of the judges. The list of winners, contestants, and more pics from the show are here.

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